I'm still here

Sorry for not updating everyone.  I think my state of mind didn't help - bit low after this last treatment. 


The last week has been filled with weather watching.  DadD and Heather were due down this weekend, but had been surrounded by snow and frozen pipes, so we weren't sure if they'd make it.  I text them on Friday afternoon and said that it was better to be safe than sorry as the news had reported blocked roads etc.  I got one back saying they were 10 miles from Chippenham!  They weren't due until the Saturday, so this was indeed a surprise.  They'd taken the chance whilst they could and booked in an extra night at the Travelodge.

This meant that it was all systems go on Saturday when they came to us (bearing gifts of mince pies to have with fresh coffee!).  We had arranged to have our Christmas dinner with them over the weekend.  As it had been touch and go as to them coming, I hadn't got the turkey etc.  So Saturday was Christmas food shopping in Waitrose.  Managed to get a frozen turkey which spent the night in the kitchen defrosting. 
Sunday was spent clothes shopping for Adam's Duke of Edinburgh training expedition this coming weekend.  A coat, waterproof trousers, winter hiking trousers, backpack and a whistle later...........!  Then back home to start the Christmas dinner.  I haven't cooked a big meal like that in ages and I think it showed.  Everyone was very polite though and said they enjoyed it.  I have to admit, I was knackered by Sunday night.

Liv was shopping on Saturday and back at work on Sunday (yaaaay!), so she didn't get to see our visitors for very long.  We scheduled the Christmas dinner for after she finished work on Sunday, so at least she was around for that.  I took pity on her on Monday and got up early (well early for me!) to take her to work.  I needed the car to pick the boys up as Liv was working until 17:00.

I'd arranged to have lunch with Susie B and she very kindly took me for an Indian.  Brrrrr, it was cold out, but a 3 course lunch warmed us up.  We were the only ones in there, so had very attentive staff!

Today was line flushing day with the District Nurse.  That went ok, no problems.  Tomorrow I'm at the hospital to see the Oncologist and have bloods taken for Friday's chemo (hoping they may get blood from the PICC line - I've been on Clexane for a while now).  I'll hopefully find out a bit about radiotherapy.  I have a few questions too, such as how do they know the chemo has worked? How can they be sure that it's nowhere else in my body? I want to know what the prognosis is after all the treatment has finished.  My half empty outlook on life is convinced that at some stage in my future this is going to raise it's ugly head again somewhere else.  I just hope that it gives me a break so I can have a decent future. 

Sorry, maudlin again!  On a more positive note, my hair seems to be growing back - at least on my head anyway.  No point in a photo as you can hardly see it.  It's very downy and Chris and the kids like to stroke it - that's when I'm not wearing a hat 'cos it's cold!  We can't quite work out the colour yet.  There seems to be a mixture of dark and light (for light read grey!), but we'll see.

Although it's the last chemo on Friday, my heart still sinks when I think of having to go through it again, but go through it I will!  Then, I'll be able to have a relaxing Christmas without the prospect of another chemo session - woohoo!