OH MY GOD! Where to begin..........?
THURS 24th
Chris has already mentioned our morning on the ward, so I won't go over old ground. As he said, there were a few tears when it was time for him to go, it brought it all a bit closer. I changed into a rather fetching hospital gown that (yes you guessed it) didn't tie up properly at the back! Toilets, naturally were down the corridor, so my trip to the loo was interesting, as by this time visitors were starting to arrive.
I'd already had my pre-meds, which included anti-sickness tablets (I don't do sick). My "drivers" soon arrived and wheeled me off to theatre. This turned out to be in the main hospital building, so I ended up being taken on a magical mystery tour. All too soon, we arrived at our destination. I had to get off the bed in the corridor - another flash of my arse to the rest of the world! Lovely team to put me under. Jenny came in and said hello and ask me if all was.............zzzzzzzzzzzzzzzz.
Next I knew I was back on the ward, on a drip with an oxygen mask over my face. Not much to say about that really, don't remember much. Vaguely recall talking to Chris and Vaughan, but not what was said (no change there then, I hear them cry!). The rest of the night was spent being woken up for obs and medication.
Friday gave me the chance to study my fellow inmates, although not for long as they all got discharged! Just as well really as the young girl in the next bed was constantly on the phone to her friends and ?ex-boyfriend. I say ex, because it wasn't a pleasant conversation. If she said "get over yourself" once, she must have said it continuously about a dozen times!
Didn't take long for 2 of the beds to be filled though - both gynae ops. Beryl, who is 89 and deaf and Annabel, married to a vet and who had just become a grandmother. Both were brilliant and made a few days bearable for me. We even managed to have a laugh - mainly at Beryl's expense as she kept waltzing off for a walk and forgetting her catheter. Annabel and I would leap out of bed (well maybe a slight exaggeration, as she had a catheter and I had drains to carry around) to warn her because she couldn't hear us shouting.
Irene, my BCN (Breast Care Nurse), came round to show me what exercises I have to do. "Morcambe and Wise" 5 times, 5 times a day.........bring me bloody sunshine!
It was interesting watching all the different nurses and student nurses and the different ways they dealt with things. Life in hospital was punctuated with medication, food, tea, coffee and beds changed daily. Menu's were given out the day before and the food was just about edible. It started at 07:00 every morning with a choice of cornflakes, rice krispies, weetabix, porridge or bread and jam (what no toast??). The main meals were served at 12:00 with sandwiches for supper at 17:00.
Visiting was twice a day and exhausting at times. Annabel said after one visit "are your family always like that? That'll definitely take your mind off things!". It's interesting to note that was the day Chris, Gaynor and Livi visited! My visitors all left me feeling very special that they'd made the effort to come and see me. My Dad even came up from Cornwall (his journey would have been even quicker, if it wasn't for other cars on the road!! tut tut). Those that were unable to visit sent very welcome text messages. I wasn't allowed to charge my phone (my charger hasn't been PAT tested like all their equipment!), so only turned it on to pick up messages.
I also managed to have sneaky peaks at the blog to see how Chris was doing! I was beginning to think my efforts would be redundant! He did a brilliant job and I think he should start his own. His thoughts and feelings were a revelation to me at times and very touching (and yes, they made me cry!). I think he's struggling with all of this and I don't know how to help him, he's all over the place. I'm sure it's just a matter of time, but he will get there.
I've loved reading all the comments, thank you.
Saturday was the first chance I got to see my new body in the mirror. Oh dear, it really did happen. I sobbed my heart out, it looks surreal, not how it's meant to be. I'm sure I'll get used to - case of having to really.
Sunday wasn't brilliant, decided to have a shower, I desperately needed to wash my hair (sorry to those who had the pleasure of seeing me with the stuck to the head style!). Stood in the shower enclosure and wondered where the hell to start! Still had 1 drain in and was asked not to get the dressings wet. Ok, so not so much a "shower" but a "dry" with a bit of wet thrown in. More tears, this was getting pathetic - just get on with it! Got there in the end and was looking forward to sitting down relaxing (again), but ended up in the loo with a dodgy tum. All got sorted in the end, stopped the Diclofenac and felt better in the afternoon. Had to say bye to Annabel, as she'd been let out for good behaviour and hello to a new inmate, 19 year old Tessa (appendectomy). Her parents were in Spain - she was at college over here, so she kept in touch with them by mobile, her Grandad visiting her. Another young girl came in with a Crohns
My drain felt like it was getting heavier, so I imagined that come Monday they would turn round and tell me it needed to stay in a bit longer. Luckily for me, when Irene, came round she found it hadn't drained much during the last 24 hours, so it was ok for me to have that out and go home!
There were, however, a few things to go through first. Irene took me and Frances (my post op mastectomy bra!) to a quiet room to fit my first temporary prosthesis (called a Comfy). We popped Fran on and then Irene went to a large cupboard full of boobs! There were comfy's and silicone prostheses (permanent) galore, all shapes and sizes! She's obviously done this many times before and pulled out the correct one first time! Actually it doesn't look that bad considering. After that, she went through some more exercises that I have to do from 5th July as well as "Morcambe and Wise". We talked about Lymphoedema and things I have to look out for and watch "for ever" not just while I'm healing. These include not having injections, bloods or blood pressure taken from that arm and being careful not to get any cuts or grazes in case of infection - another leaflet to add to my growing collection. Jenny popped in to say hi and check my wounds. She was pleased with how they looked, but didn't expect me to be. She's so lovely.
Then after a chat and more tears (!) it was back to the ward to wait for my drain removal and home. There was a new patient being booked in for her op, husband by her side, so I had to wait for my drain to be taken out. I was suddenly transported back to Thursday, saying bye to Chris. The new lady was busy telling her husband that the compression stockings were to stop DVDs (made me chuckle)!
Eventually, the deed was done and I settled down to wait for Chris, who I'd asked to come in for 14:00. After ringing to say he was stuck in a queue for the car park, we finally left about 14:45!
Home at last.
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